When I speak of informed consent, I speak from a truly heartfelt place of love and concern for everyone.
Contrary to what it may seem, I have no "big dream" that all women do X Y and or Z with their babies or their bodies or their children or their lives.
What my "big dream" IS, is that we as a people have real access to real scientific, factual, experiential, historical truth. Then and only then will there be a level playing field, so to speak, for mothers and babies and their families.
Bottle vs. Breast
Hospital vs. Homebirth
To vaccinate vs. To not vaccinate
Circumsize vs. Intact
Disposable diapers vs. Cloth
Cry it out vs. Sleep/nurse 24/7
School vs. Homeschool
Stroller vs. Sling
this list can go on and on. But whats with all this "VERSUS" stuff? It sounds like a bunch of battles, a bunch of fuel on the fire, a bunch of self righteousness, a bunch of seperatist language and imagery that mimics a male model of aggresion and conflict and destroys the very foundation of Creating a Village, Circle of Sisters, and everything we women need.
Noone is so black and white in their actual living, because life is not black and white. We can feel passionately about something and then life throws us a curveball and we are back to square one. I always joke that I knew it all about parenting until I actually had a child.
I want the other Mamas and babies and families to not have to suffer BECAUSE THEY DIDNT KNOW. thats all.
I want the other Mamas to spend their precious time and energy on their families and not on regrets.
If that is so wrong, or if that makes me militant or polarized or biased or one sided, then I will work on it. I am not here to judge, but I am also not going to hold my toungue like a good little patient when I want women to know some truth and some fact and some info and some options. I did that for many many years and that is not me anymore.
What do I want? What is my point?
I would love for women to not have to spend their entire pregnancies, postpartum period and all their years of child rearing to be filled with decisions that they made under duress, under anesthesia, out of ignornace, out of sociatal pressure, out of conformity, out of fear.
Access and full disclosure for women. From the grassroots level to the healthcare system to the coffee shops to the media and so on and so on.
I'm sure the person who discovered that lack of hand-washing was killing women by the millions from puerperal fever had a rough time selling his story at first, too. Its MUCH more within folks' comfort zone to think that someone they love went through something really awful because "life is mysterious"--and life IS mysterious. and bad things DO happen for reasons we do not comprehend. B U T, why withold our stories from each other?