Ok, y'all, I REALLY need advice and am open to all and anything, help!!!
Obviously I can go to my doctor, but right now he is out of town and I see him in 2 weeks. I need real advice, living words, something. He is a great guy but I am pretty sure he will say "its gonna take time." right as he tells me I cant have any more Vicodin and to take some Motrin. Then I will cry and he will start in about PPDepression. Which I do get and am aware of, but dudes, dudettes, people of the Earth--Why cant I just have a seriously painfilled body and that be dealt with? I dont want Prozac, I want pain-relief, and some exercises that I can actually do in this decrepit position I am in. Cant it be possible to just be owchy and achy and tired and that be ok, do I "have" to be mental? Does anyone agree or get that being in major pain is depressing, period? Not being able to do the things you want or need to do sucking? Cant I just be some guy who got knifed in the alley, does it have to be depession, MUST they guilt trip me so hard about the Vicodin? (I take 1 or 2 a day, 13 left, then no more. Thanks! My family appreciates it! Shove your Motrins up your well-intentioned asses! "they are hard on your liver"....let me worry about my damn liver, Ill take Milk Thistle, it will all work out.....argggggggg)
So, I feel like CRAP. I am asking for real suggestions as to how I am ever, ever going to be a fit and strong girl again--hell, even an upright Mama who goes to homeschool field trip day or the library, seriously. I guess
I will just list what my symptoms are right now. Obviously, my incision area is sore and achy and tender and inside my abdominal "muscles" are just hurting and aching from being upright at all. My back aches--aches so badly. My hands ache like I have severe, severe arthritis--I am that old lady who cant open the medicine bottle now--for real. My bones hurt all over like the flu and I have hot flashes if I "do too much" which literally means do anything beyond quiet babycare things.
I am not going to list everything else that I feel ok about--sore swollen breasts, sore neck, blabla because those are not worrysome to me. those are totally normal and expected and I am fine about that stuff.
But, in my condition, this isnt about me renting some PostPartumBoogyBum exercise tape. I mean, I feel so run down and so horrifically weak and SORE, how the hell am I ever ever going to get it together, so to speak? I have five kids, FIVE--there just absolutely is NO "rest, enjoy this time, " there isnt. My husband does TONS of laundry, dishes, cleaning, takes all the other kids the moment he gets home from work and hustles his BUTT off, but during the day, there is still SO much, even if I dont clean anything, the breakfast! The lunch! the fights! the messes! the toddler insanity! I am NOT supposed to lift Charlie, but I have....Greta helps me when she can, but into the crib, out of the crib, occasional high chair, (im sorry but a quick lift into the highchair or 30 minutes of scrubbing up spaghetti all over the halls and bedrooms because he is "pissed that I had a baby and throws food now?" I have to do highchair.
So, what? walking? yoga? green spirulina drinks? herbs? vitamins?
I cant "treat myself" to any kind of alternative healers because we do not have the money or insurance coverage for it nor do i want to take 5 kids to the chiropractor or acupuncture. I honestly do not know when I would be up for the 5-kid car trip without Daddy but it wont be for a while, thats all I know. Which is depressing and sucky but today we all went to WalMart and I ended up just going back to the car to nurse alone in the heat and it was a fiasco and I was sooooo tired afterwards and even had a creepy sensation like my insides were falling out--total sucky nightmare, the whole thing was a dumb idea but I wanted to go with them....
I could take a class or something cheap if it was evenings. Swimming? Do I bring the baby? Can you do tampons if you didnt have a vaginal delivery? Cant bleed all over the pool....why dont I know anything after 5 babies????
Ok so everyone write and tell me how to get better from this pregnancy and c section and I will owe you eternally. I will eat or take anything and will try anything, magnets, prayers, powders creams pills stretching....help!